For an anxious personality like me, there was panic. Fear. Screaming inside my head. Flashbacks. Worry for kids. Worry for grandkids. Tears. Palpitations. Sweating. Sugar lows. Nightmares. No sleep. Hallucinations. Lack of appetite.
After a WEEK AM on tranquilizers in addition to 2 other anxiety medications. Still have fear. Jittery. Inside my head, I am running around in circles. Crying. Screaming.
Wanted to leave this place from before the Mayhem. No one listens to me. No one calms me down. No hugs. No concern for my mental state. No assurance. But everyone is going through the shitshow here. It's worse on me due to my chronic anxiety.
I started looking at emigration. At the very least, moving to a different place. Lack of support and empathy makes me try harder to keep quiet and calm down. That's easier said than done.
I have no qualifications. No retirement fund. No money of my own. My suggestions hold no value.
This is another time when I hate myself for not being educated enough. When you have no money, you have nothing. If I had money to contribute, my ideas would have been taken seriously long ago when I said let's move.
So I pray. Keep my faith regardless. Stay medicated. Try very hard to keep my head down, my mouth shut. Just waiting to die really. Waiting to die.
I pray you are safe wherever in the world you are.
Thanks for reading #anxiety #unrest #help
Peace and love
LADY S
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